Where has the time gone since the twenty-year-old me? Seems like long ago, yet feels like yesterday. Sometimes it would be great to go back to that time, to go back to the time of my youth, to my inexperience, to my naivete, my innocence, my fear, my insecurity, all while not having a clue regarding my future. As an old saying goes, “but only if I knew then what I know now.”
The road since twenty-year-old me has been rocky and curvy, with wrong turns, detours, and broken roads, while at times having smooth, straight driving. Despite the road I traveled in life, it brought me to where and who I am today.
As with most of us, there has been much I’ve learned since twenty-year-old me. I’ve gained wisdom, knowledge, and maturity. The now me looks back on the twenty-year-old me and sees who I was and who the now me has become along the way. Loving in the way I knew and know how to love, caring sometimes to a fault, often misguided and misunderstood (by both others as well as by myself), still naïve and often stubborn, I can finally accept both versions of me for who I was and who I am, regardless of my imperfections.
Since twenty-year-old me, I am learning forgiveness, not only in forgiving others but also in forgiving myself. Forgiveness is a powerful experience.
To quote the title (in part) of one of the songs sung by Barry Manilow, “Looks like I made it.“
Now, looking forward to the future me, I wonder who she will be and what road she will travel. Maybe she will be someone who will wrap past mistakes with things she missed in life to make the last part of life the best part of living. Come to think of it, I know she will make that happen.
